The Pride is an emotion with a remarkable feature that unlike the rest: good or bad depending on the context or intensity. That is, it has a very positive and a very negative side for the individual.

In a good way, pride is given by a positive self-worth of being in itself and this is a positive and normal condition. On the other hand, in the negative form of pride it appears in a high esteem or self-esteem in which the person loses all capacity for contact and empathy with their peers.

Pride and self esteem

Pride is related to self-esteem insofar as it is an emotion associated with a feeling of self-love and self-worth.

A person with good self-esteem can be proud of his achievements, of all the goals that he has achieved through study, dedication, discipline, work, effort and perseverance. At this point, pride is a positive quality.

We can also feel proud of the achievements of other people and openly express the way in which we feel about the goals achieved. In the same way, the inhabitants of a country, in many cases, feel national pride for being born in that land. With the same sentiment, individuals who belong to sports, religious or social groups after reaching some successful goal are identified.

The behaviors described above are considered positive and associated with self-esteem as long as they are not used as an attack tool against other people. In these cases, pride acquires negative characteristics and is the generator of a series of conflicts in all areas of our life.

The proud spends his life immersed in an eternal conflict with all people because he has a self-conception of superiority about himself.

Conflicts generated by pride

The main conflicts that are generated as a result of exacerbated pride are:

Inability to establish healthy relationships

From his position, he is incapable of establishing healthy links with any of his peers since his main defect is arrogance, which prevents him from relating from equality.

In any human relationship, it is essential that there is equality among its members so that there is the possibility of agreements, negotiations and justice in which each person can experience the same degree of well-being and growth.

The arrogant, by feeling superior to the other, will establish a relationship with a conflictive dynamic characterized by continuous disqualifications, disrespect and verbal violence. In fact, it is impossible for these people to relate to others in a normal way since they do not consider them as their equals and this means that in no way there will be an openness to the creation and establishment of links.

Lack of empathy

Given his continuing attitude of authoritarianism, he lacks the ability to establish empathy with other people, he is incapable of conceiving other individuals as deserving of respect and considering them for their own human condition. He is a completely intolerant individual and does not accept differences.

The energy of this person turns only in one direction, for himself. The rest of the people are assumed as wrong and of little value from their point of view. The only important person in his world is himself.

His relationship with other people is based on continuous abuse, anger and constant criticism. Only from this point does he relate to other individuals. He is not able to put himself in the other’s shoes for an instant or to worry about the feelings he generates after his continuous attacks.

They are intolerant of criticism

Their rigid stance in the face of any type of criticism places them in a rather uphill position to forge love, family or work relationships. They openly resist any type of change that is proposed to them and disqualify any criticism.

This particular way of behaving in society closes any possibility of integrating work teams and acceptance in general. At the work level, they cause major conflicts within organizations and affect the work environment since they are not able to integrate.

As they do not possess their own leadership qualities, if they are granted the position of bosses, they will exercise it from an authoritarian point of view.

They set insane competitions

Due to their characteristics, they are usually people with an exacerbated sense of competitiveness, which they direct negatively towards other people. They are atrocious and disloyal competitors, seeking to demonstrate their superiority at all times.

They do not strive to improve or grow as human beings because the excessive esteem they feel towards themselves places them at a higher level that makes it impossible for them to self-reflection and recognize their mistakes.

They lack humility

The high level at which these people self-assigned prevents them from placing their feet on the ground and seeing life objectively. On the contrary, they distance themselves from humanity and create a kind of demigods.

The extremely proud person will lack the ability to recognize that he is a person composed of virtues, strengths, weaknesses and defects. They can come to feel like the bearers of the absolute truth, experiencing victim feelings when feeling misunderstood.

It will be difficult for the proud to admit that he is wrong and will hide behind hundreds of excuses to justify his mistake because he himself does not conceive the permission to fail. In his particular walled castle, only the weak make mistakes and the strong must never allow them.

His lack of connection with humility places him at a disadvantage compared to others to the extent that his inability to rectify and his continued denial of the acquisition of new strategies or learning distances him from growth at all levels.

On a sentimental level, the person with exacerbated pride suffers enormously even if he does not show it since he manages to alienate people who at some point have the intention of being part of his life due to their negative attitudes, contempt and disqualification.

By Dr. Eric Jackson

Dr. Eric Jackson provides primary Internal Medicine care for men and women and treats patients with bone and mineral diseases, diabetes, heart conditions, and other chronic illnesses.He is a Washington University Bone Health Program physician and is a certified Bone Densitometrist. Dr. Avery is consistently recognized in "The Best Doctors in America" list.

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