John and Ann Betar, who have been married for 83 years, might not be very familiar with online sites that promote dating or dating for couples, but their advice for a lasting relationship still holds true for those of us in the modern dating world. He is 104, she is 100, and they still hold hands.
Oldest marriage in America
It all started in Bridgeport, Connecticut, in 1932. Retelling her history, Ann said, “We were friends. He took me to school. The other boys went to dance halls, or played poker. He would get up on Sunday and put his baseball suit on and get in his little sports car. ”
His father wanted him to marry someone much older – but he knew that Juan was the one. And he knew it too.
“She is the girl he had loved,” he said. “Forever. And I had wanted to marry her. ”
Thus, at the ages of 17 and 21, Ann and John eloped together in Harrison, New York. In the 1960s, they moved to a small beach house in Fairfield, Connecticut – where they remain to this day.
The day of last love perhaps you could not have fulfilled all their expectations of love, and who better than this couple who have been married for more time in the US to consult them for any advice you need in your relationships.
The older couple advises for a lasting relationship
In a Twitter Q&A session hosted by a company, they shared some little nuggets of loving wisdom.
Of course, everyone wanted to know what their “secret” was to a long and loving marriage or relationship. In response to a Twitter user Ann said: “It’s a lifelong thing. How do you define love? Through actions, understanding, little things … ”, and Juan said:“ I would like to know! It comes naturally to us. It is understanding without analysis. ”
Their responses show that there is no single formula for a successful relationship. Everyone falls in love in different ways. John had a much more love-at-first-sight aspect to the experience with Ann, while Ann grew comfortable with him slowly, over time.
But after 83 years of marriage, another user asked, “What do you do to keep things fresh, new, and entertaining?” Ann emphasized the importance of touch: “We hold on to each other, just a few little hugs, and that’s fine with that.”
And you can tell that what they are doing is working. Sure, they are still married, but they still have a sense of humor for each other. Another user asked: “What do you do after a discussion? Do they solve it the same day? ” Ann said, “I tell him, ‘Oh, do what you want.’ Nine times out of ten he doesn’t! ” John replied, “We never hold a grudge. Most of the discussions are about food, “ and Ann adds,” Yes, such as, “You bought the wrong kind of cucumber.”
Other questions they were asked were as follows: “What do you think about the fact that people are now getting married a little older?” Ann: “We were just lucky, it was that time, we don’t live in an environment where a lot of people meet. It was a very small community. I think if you wait, it makes more sense in your head. “John:” You can do anything these days. Couples can just live together. ”
“What kind of advice do you think can be given to modern dating people? Is the key still old-fashioned? ” John: “Things are so different now. I like the old way. Ann: “If you are going to marry someone and you think you can change them, you are crazy. It can not. I do not think it could be.”
“What do you like best about each other?” Ann: “John is a very generous man, in every way. But… he has a stubborn mind, so it should just be what he says. Judy [the couple’s daughter] is also that way. She has a mind just like her father. Although they are very successful people, that is not disputed. John: “I love this woman. That’s all.” Ann: “That’s why he’s still living with me… he’s still trying to find out.” John: “ I just love her. How he cooks … ”
Reminder: why is it bad to sound like an old marriage? Judging from that little interaction alone, it seems the simplest and best there is. They look as fresh as cucumbers, which makes it obvious that a lasting relationship can be done.