“Love does not recognize barriers. Jump fences, jump fences, penetrate walls to reach your destination full of hope, ”wrote Maya Angelou. Love is, in fact, a powerful thing. It seems capable of overcoming any obstacle. Why, then, do marriages often fall apart? It seems that beyond infidelities, the greatest threat to a marriage is rather something else that can be the cause of that and more. Read on to find out and what you can do to keep your marriage from being threatened.

The greatest threat to a marriage is negligence

What is the most common cause of divorce? Money problems? Infidelity? Incompatibility? These are all great causes, but there is a more common and insidious problem than all three of these combined. It occurs, to some extent, in almost all marriages.

It is marital negligence.

Most of us consider ourselves too busy to make our marriage a priority. We feel safe and put our energy into other areas of our lives. We don’t feel the need to intentionally invest in our marriage. It is not in danger.

Until it is.

When we don’t intentionally invest in our marriage, we allow it to weaken. We tend not to worry about hard times. They seem so far away. We invest in our career, our children, and our home. Marriage remains in the background , ignored.

Then disaster strikes.

This could be a job loss, illness, or a heated disagreement. Whatever the reason, your marriage doesn’t feel so secure anymore. What you left happily simmering starts to boil, or boils down to nothing at all. You weren’t paying attention, and things changed.

6 ways to make your relationship or marriage last

What we will share next is scientifically proven. If you want to keep your marriage strong and resilient, you can’t wait until trouble arises to spend your time and energy saving it. You have to start when things are good.
Here are five things you can do every day to keep your marriage strong:

1. Hug each other for thirty seconds

Hugging is good for your health, as well as your connection. Thirty seconds is a hug long enough to feel intimate, but short enough not to impose yourself on your day.

2. Share an inside joke

Laughter connects you with your spouse and relieves stress. Laugh together during the good times, and the bad times will pass more easily. As Joanne Woodward said, “Sexiness thins out after a while and beauty fades, but being married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, that’s a real treat.”

3. Share your day

Before going to bed, take turns telling your partner the details of your work day. You will be surprised how much you learn.

4. Talk to each other on the phone at lunch

Have a quick chat, send a sweet text, or forward a fun email. Show your partner who’s on your mind.

5. Kiss often

Kissing is magical in its ability to bring two people together. Kiss to say hello. Always give a kiss when you say goodbye. Kiss when asking for a favor and saying thank you. Just kiss and more kiss!

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person,” explained Mignon McLaughlin. Make an effort to fall in love with your spouse every day. Soon, your relationship will be bulletproof.

By Dr. Eric Jackson

Dr. Eric Jackson provides primary Internal Medicine care for men and women and treats patients with bone and mineral diseases, diabetes, heart conditions, and other chronic illnesses.He is a Washington University Bone Health Program physician and is a certified Bone Densitometrist. Dr. Avery is consistently recognized in "The Best Doctors in America" list.

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