Does your partner emotionally mistreat you? Abuses are not only those where your partner hits you, even when he does not get to put a hand on you, if he insults you, belittles you or tries to denigrate you, you are suffering as much as someone who is hit by his partner, the damage that this causes type of abuse can fill you with fear and disability, discover the symptoms of an abuser so that you can get out of it if this is your case.

What is psychological abuse

The emotional abuse is defined as a behavior and language designed to degrade or humiliate someone attacking their own value or personality.

While a normal partner may disagree about how to spend money, for example, an emotional abuser will make his partner feel as if she is too stupid to understand the complexities of finances.

Characteristics of psychological abuse

It can range from verbal abuse (yelling, blaming, shaming) to isolation, intimidation, and threats. It also often appears as behaviors that make victims feel alone and unimportant.

Although there are few firm statistics on the prevalence of psychological abuse among partners, experts say that up to two-thirds experience it, one-third of them chronically. Its effects can be devastating: depression, anxiety and destroyed self-esteem.

Types of emotional abuse

The Emotional abuse can be subtle , the person can not scream or humiliate verbally but their actions show how your partner is annoying, cluttering, trying all the time to be away from her, asking her to stop hug him, kiss him and even closer , she never gives a show of affection, thereby making her partner gradually lose self-confidence.

It can also be more aggressive, it is when for any inconvenience or disagreement, the person begins to yell, humiliate or denigrate, makes his partner believe that he is clumsy, that he is useless and that no one else in life would bear to have him around, with this he destroys also her confidence and achieves that out of fear that everyone else will reject her, she stays with the abuser, even seeing him as her salvation .

He also has ways of persuading his partner, demonstrating through outbursts of rage what is bothering him and how he is capable of putting himself on if he does not like something, in this way he sets limits so that his partner knows that there may be consequences if he does this or not. Which thing. This is a subtle way to manipulate your partner’s behaviors , thoughts, and reactions.

How do I know it is abuse and not just a difficulty in the relationship?

Sometimes people wonder if ” abuse ” or ” emotional abuse ” is the correct term to describe the difficulties they are going through in their relationship. They may feel like their partner is yelling at them a lot or making them feel bad, but they think “abuse” would be too “dramatic” a word to use.

But the point is how abusive behavior makes you feel. If your partner’s behavior makes you feel small and controlled or like you can’t talk about what’s wrong or wrong, if you feel like your partner is preventing you from being able to express yourself , that’s abusive. If you feel like you have to change your actions to accommodate your partner’s behavior, it is abusive.

There can be many reasons why people behave this way. They may have grown up in a family environment where there was a lot of yelling or sarcasm, or they have been in relationships in the past that made them feel insecure. Sometimes in couples therapy, we are able to consider those behaviors, and the impact on the relationship. However, while this might help you understand those behaviors, it can never be used as an excuse, as that’s by no means okay.

How to get out?

If you feel that you are being subjected to abusive behavior on the part of your partner, remember that you deserve to have a voice, and you do not deserve to be belittled or fearful in your own relationship.

One of the most useful first steps if you feel like you are in an abusive relationship is to talk to someone outside of it, it could be a friend, a family member, or a therapist.

Talking to someone who is not involved may give you a bit of perspective. This can be very useful, since an external person can more easily detect abusive behaviors, since they are not romantically involved.

Dr. Eric Jackson

By Dr. Eric Jackson

Dr. Eric Jackson provides primary Internal Medicine care for men and women and treats patients with bone and mineral diseases, diabetes, heart conditions, and other chronic illnesses. He is a Washington University Bone Health Program physician and is a certified Bone Densitometrist. Dr. Avery is consistently recognized in "The Best Doctors in America" list.

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