A happy person does not have time to devote himself to filling his soul with reproaches, complaints and criticism towards everyone else, he prefers instead to focus on his life and improve what is within his reach to continue enjoying his happiness.

Emotional deficiencies tend to be disguised very well to deceive us, (although our hearts always know our truth), making us believe that what we lack are materials and things, and that deficiency motivates envy and jealousy, wanting to buy ourselves and wanting to devalue what we are. someone projects us wrongly.

The negative projection of criticism

When what we lack in ourselves prevents us from judging others objectively, a phenomenon known as negative projection arises   . This is a defense mechanism in which we attribute our own flaws and weaknesses to others. In situations of emotional conflict, we attribute to others and outside of ourselves, our own feelings or thoughts that are unacceptable to ourselves.

The negative projection manipulates situations of emotional conflicts that arise from internal affairs, attributing to others our own feelings or thoughts that are unacceptable to us. We project the feelings or thoughts that we cannot accept as our own because they cause us distress or anxiety, so we direct them to others and attribute them entirely to those people as if they were their thoughts or feelings.

It is necessary to know how to separate our history from the history of others, to establish a healthy limit that maintains us as individuals and not as projections towards everyone else. This burden creates anguish and takes us too far from a state similar to happiness, and even takes us away from what people really have to offer us.

Speaking badly of others keeps you in a comfort zone

Gossiping or ” badmouthing others ” is one way to keep your distance. If we are talking about another person, that does not give us time to talk about ourselves. In many ways gossiping or gossiping is a great way to stay safe while also feeling like we’re ” doing something to change things .” We can talk about someone else, highlight what is bad or what we consider wrong, but we never put ourselves in a vulnerable situation, nor are we making any changes.

Negative gossip

Negative gossip is spreading harmful news about someone, speaking ill of someone behind their back, speaking with contempt of others, ridiculing or laughing at someone, or saying something behind someone who you would not later say to their face.

The problem is that when we gossip, in addition to hurting others, we also hurt ourselves. We hurt ourselves because we teach people that we cannot be trusted. I remember being in a group of women who talked about other people without a second thought. Inevitably, I would walk away wondering what they were going to say about me once I got out of there. It was a very uncomfortable feeling. At that moment I realized that if we talk about acquaintances, there is no reason to think that we won’t talk about our friends as well.

They show a toxic personality

The picky people or always have something bad to say about others, are toxic people and lack of initiatives to surround himself with welfare and happiness, this apathy to seek the welfare and always emphasize the negative turns them into people who intoxicate those with those who speak.

The difference then seems very evident, the person who feels comfortable with himself and with what he has, can hardly use almost all day to look for the bad in others and be highlighting it from the rooftops, if you know someone like that, You can probably tell that they have a bitter life or lack a sense of humor (which is a privilege today) The most advisable thing is to get away from these types of people, but if instead it is you who lives criticizing and speaking ill of others, you should change your point of focus, and start looking at your life, perhaps there is more than one thing that you can adjust to fill your heart with joy and your days with good times.

By Dr. Eric Jackson

Dr. Eric Jackson provides primary Internal Medicine care for men and women and treats patients with bone and mineral diseases, diabetes, heart conditions, and other chronic illnesses.He is a Washington University Bone Health Program physician and is a certified Bone Densitometrist. Dr. Avery is consistently recognized in "The Best Doctors in America" list.

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