The bond of a mother with her daughter is something extremely powerful that is created from the moment a woman begins to lead a life in her womb. A daughter will always carry with her aspects of her mother that are internalized in her throughout the parenting cycle, even before she is born. Many aspects of what it means to be a woman will depend on the relationship that a mother has with her daughter .

The importance of the bonds between a mother and her daughter

A mother (like the father) is the one who offers the first show of affection, the first examples to follow in the life of a girl and these bonds will influence the development of that girl’s story when she becomes a woman. . Depending on how this relationship is, it will have consequences in the course of their lives. The teachings of a mother will always be present consciously and unconsciously.

The problem is when the relationship has been toxic, with a possessive or controlling mother. These bonds have negative consequences throughout the daughter’s life, and if these wounds are not healed and overcome, they can become a vicious cycle that is passed from generation to generation.

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Importance of maternal care

Children constantly seek the approval of the mother, this because of the biological need that a child feels for his mother to care for and feed him, that is, he depends on her for so many years, that when he is older he still needs her approval for many aspects of their life.

The bond between mother and daughter is something with a lot of power, something positive that will be important for the development in every sense of a woman, because in addition, feminine traits are shared and should be used (in a healthy relationship) to enrich life of the two parties .

But this bond is not always a positive thing, as some people develop a pathological need for approval that causes the mother to have full control of the children’s lives and is totally necessary for any movement they have to give. This is very problematic, since children must be able to live and decide alone, take charge of their lives, they must learn from mistakes and see their mother as a support only, but not as a solution.

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How to be independent

If a woman has unresolved issues and problems in her mother-daughter relationship, she must be able to detect what those unfinished aspects are to end them and close the cycle , only in this way can she move forward, have a happy life and not commit the same mistakes with future children. It is not easy to take the first step, but it is necessary to do it.

Just as daughters must put an end to problems, mothers must be able to understand that they must not give their lives completely to their sons or family, and must not control them but give them the tools so that they can make their lives for themselves. A mother is first of all a woman, and she should not put aside some needs for her family.

Although in society the term “motherhood” is equal to “sacrifice”, it does not have to be that way, a mother spends a lot of time with her children but should never completely sacrifice her life. Many times the same society forces women to behave in this way, which creates the problem of bonding with their children, since deep down they can blame them for not being able to achieve some goals because of them. That is why both must heal in order to have a fruitful and positive relationship.

By Dr. Eric Jackson

Dr. Eric Jackson provides primary Internal Medicine care for men and women and treats patients with bone and mineral diseases, diabetes, heart conditions, and other chronic illnesses.He is a Washington University Bone Health Program physician and is a certified Bone Densitometrist. Dr. Avery is consistently recognized in "The Best Doctors in America" list.

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