The common perception, when we talk about sexual infidelity, is that men are always the ones who do it. Needless to say, this idea is more outdated than anything. In reality, women are just as likely to be unfaithful as men. That said, men and women tend to think about their infidelity in very different ways and have very different reasons for doing so. Read on to learn about some of the reasons why infidelity exists in women .

For starters, men are much more likely to seek a purely objectified sex experience without any compromise. Meanwhile, women are much more likely to be interested in sex that includes (or at least hints at) some kind of emotional connection.

In one study, anthropologist Helen Fisher observed married men and women who were actively cheating on their spouses. It found that 34 percent of the women were happily married, compared to 56 percent of the men.

Another study of men and women who were actively cheating found that 57 percent of women felt an emotional connection with their partner in romance, compared to 27 percent of men. Taken together, these results (and the results of many other studies) strongly suggest that women, far more than men, are seeking emotional connection when they are unfaithful.

8 reasons for infidelity in women

Of course, the need for an emotional connection is just one of many reasons for infidelity in women, although it is often of the utmost importance. Other motivations include:

1. They are struggling with low self-esteem

In such cases of infidelity in women, they seek external validation through romantic and sexual intrigue. If they are loved romantically and sexually, they feel it is worthwhile, desirable, necessary, etc.

2. They have unrealistic expectations about what their primary partner should provide.

They think that their royal partner must fulfill their every whim and desire. When this expectation is not met, they seek external satisfaction.

3. They want a little extra spark in their life

They bypass the neurochemical rush by meeting someone new, flirting with that person, and being sexual for the first time. They find their ongoing relationship predictable and maybe a little boring, so they grab a little excitement elsewhere.

4. They are unhappy in their current relationship.

There may be a lack of intimacy (a lack of emotional connection, as mentioned above), there may be a lack of sex (for any number of reasons), your partner may not be close enough to meet your physical and emotional needs, or things could just be falling apart as they sometimes do in relationships.

In such cases, it may be that they cheat to see if there is something better out there or they align with someone new before they end their current relationship.

5. They feel abandoned and alone at home

These women generally feel more like a babysitter, a housekeeper, a mother, or a financial service provider than an equally valued true partner. As such, they use romance and sex outside of their primary relationship to fill the emotional void.

6. They are angry and want revenge

Usually these women act in response to a betrayal by their partner. Your peers may have cheated, or spent money without asking for your opinion, or made an important life decision, without including them in the process. Outside of anger, these women might seek extracurricular sex and usually don’t try to hide it.

7. They lack female social support

Much more than men, women need social support between people of the same gender. Sometimes women, especially those who have experienced maternal abuse or neglect, underestimate this need. And at the same time they overrate men’s attention. This can lead to deception.

8. They are addicted

Sometimes women have a problem with alcohol or drugs, and these substances affect decision-making, leading to impulsive sexual decisions. Other times they are sexually and / or romantically addicted, using compulsive sex and romance as ways to escape unwanted feelings. (This desire for escape and distraction also drives substance addictions.)

As with men who cheat, there is typically no single driving force for infidelity. That being said, there is always another option. Women do not lose the ability to make decisions for themselves simply because they are bored, or their mother neglected them, or their husband bought a new car without asking.

Alternative options for a solution include: talking about your feelings with close friends by sharing in therapy, going to couples therapy as a way to improve the relationship, and, most importantly, you just have to be honest with your partner about what you are doing. is happening.

By Dr. Eric Jackson

Dr. Eric Jackson provides primary Internal Medicine care for men and women and treats patients with bone and mineral diseases, diabetes, heart conditions, and other chronic illnesses.He is a Washington University Bone Health Program physician and is a certified Bone Densitometrist. Dr. Avery is consistently recognized in "The Best Doctors in America" list.

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