Being happy is not an easy task in today’s world full of competition, rush and slavery of time and people. We depend to a great extent on it and that makes us, in the long run, feel that we are not complete when we reach a point, where we are not aware that we are being precisely what we are, to look good with someone else.
Do not expect from others more than from yourself
The only way we can avoid the impact of other people in our lives is to stop being part of social reality as we know it.
In other words – the impact of other people in our lives is inevitable, however being happy must be our priority.
It is up to us to either let them determine all of our actions or choose not to let them interfere with our own conduct and the way we handle things. Of course, the first option doesn’t exactly sound like a recipe for happiness and a less complicated life. So let’s take a closer look at how to get rid of the heaviness of thoughtlessness from others, and learn to be happy without expecting anything from others .
You are your own worst enemy. If you can learn to stop expecting impossible perfection, in yourself and in others, you can find the happiness you have always avoided.
Here are 6 things you should stop expecting from others if you want to be happy
1.- Don’t expect people to respect you if you don’t respect yourself enough
Your self-perception is the most important key to who you really are. It guides people when they are looking for a way to reach you, to talk to you, to see you. You must understand that you cannot be expected to respect yourself if you don’t respect yourself enough.
They will not admire you, if you do not admire yourself. Decide this minute to stop looking in others for proof that you are beautiful, strong, and capable. Believe it or not, you are extraordinary. Never doubt that.
2.- Stop depending on others for your own well-being
Once you get used to depending on someone else for your own well-being, you stop putting enough effort into taking care of yourself. Instead of feeling a constant lack of someone’s presence, try to focus on your own presence.
Don’t justify your laziness in putting things in order with the thought that everything will be fine once you meet that person. No one else should be more in control of your own here and now. Throw away the belief that your life will be better if you only met “the right person” because you forget to live while you are waiting for him to show up . In your own life you are the most successful person who is always there.
3.- Stop waiting for others to make you happy
There is always someone out there destined to make you happy, but don’t go looking for it. Stop expecting that every person you meet in your life is there to bring you joy and happiness . Sometimes you will feel as if someone ends up messing things up for you. Judging and getting angry won’t help. Accept the fact that the most natural thing for a human being is the goal of personal happiness.
Sometimes this idea could be in sharp conflict with your idea of happiness . You must understand that this is perfectly fine and you are perfectly capable of being happy without their contribution. But sometimes their idea of happiness may include that you are happy and then you may have met someone precious that you should probably keep.
4.- Stop waiting for people to know what you are thinking
Have you ever been disappointed by someone’s actions or inactions just because you didn’t really explain yourself or because you didn’t give any indication of how you prefer to be approached? Well then it’s time to realize that people don’t read minds. Save yourself the disappointment and stop expecting them to know what you are thinking.
Communication is the key to healthy relationships and inner peace. When meeting a new partner – skip the games and speak your mind . When you have some problems with friends – be honest and willing to talk. When you feel like it’s time to get promoted – be clear about it and be willing to show that you deserve it. Of course, there are things that need to be felt, rather than told, so be aware of them and face them with an open mind .
So yes, being open and sharing your thoughts will save you unpleasant misunderstandings and complications, it will really make your life more impressive.
5.- Don’t expect people to be well all the time
It is a good thing to think of ourselves first, but this should not mean neglecting the importance of other people. Be kind and gentle with everyone you meet, they are fighting their own battles that you may not know anything about. Don’t expect people to be okay all the time. No one is free of problems.
Practice empathy and compassion . Be prepared to find a bit of rudeness, indifference, or even cruelty around you. But don’t be in a hurry to judge. Everyone has their reason and the right to not be well.
6.- Stop waiting for people to fit into your idea of what they should be
We all know how exhausting and frustrating it is trying to fit the expectations of who we are supposed to be. What we often miss is the fact that, it is the same in reverse. That is why we have to stop insisting that others change just because we have a particular vision of who we want them to be. Growing spiritually requires generosity, but not in the material sense.
By giving people the freedom to be who they are, while still being together, you give them wings to fly and fly with someone. Don’t confuse accepting with doing something that will make you miserable . If you find qualities in someone that you cannot live with, it means that this person should not be part of your life. But waiting for it to change is redundant.
Expectations are difficult to deal with. They come naturally, but they tend to lead to a lot of trouble most of the time. So before you start to anticipate again, take a minute to analyze. Have you done your part before expecting others to do their part? Have you put yourself in these people’s shoes? Are you sure you are having the right people in your life?
It is never too late to change our ways if it means being content and at peace with ourselves.